It does not mean what you think it really means…

I guess this will be resounding mind for a long, long time…

Whomever has left these words here on my blog’s research terms, for sure knows the impact that they have over me… If, for one side, a very, very dearest friend has been doing such a curious effort to make me happy, these words can break with everything…

What should I believe?

My friend has been helping me to trust my heart, to follow it and to believe in what it is saying to me… A previous experience has taught me that, sometimes, we can really mistake somethings, because our heart wants so bad that something happens… And these words have been always my mind’s warning to this…

My friend has been teaching me to enjoy what makes me happy and comfortable. And, following my heart makes me happy. Gives me a reason to believe… And nothing could get me this freakening frightened than these hard, hurtful and so true words…

If, for one side, I trust this friend blindly, much more for all the hard times it has been facing together with me, and for never allowing me giving up or letting go what is most precious to me, for other, these words scare me to death that they can be more true than anything I’ve been believing these last days… Or should I say these last years?

And, if you dare to read this, please, do not judge me. Not always the truth is that one we can touch, and not always what is real can bee seen with our eyes… But, trusting what you see beyond your eyes is just as hard as facing the reality.

So, I just hope, deeply, I can find the truth, because this is the only thing I yearn much more than anything. I don’t wanna be happy living an ilusion, but, I don’t want also open hands of what I’ve been seen and feel it’s just as true as my faith is.

And, if you love me, you’ll show me the truth.



  1. Which part of

    “And, if you dare to read this, please, do not judge me. Not always the truth is that one we can touch, and not always what is real can bee seen with our eyes… But, trusting what you see beyond your eyes is just as hard as facing the reality.”

    you didn’t understand, Antoinette?

    And, if you don’t know, I’ve asked myself the same thing, but, don’t you think it curious how when you’re ready to give a step towards your “real life”, a couple friend just do everything to keep you from giving up? Which leads me to the conclusion they might know something else that I don’t, so, why not believing and trusting? Which interest could they have so much that I kept thinking of Mr. Groban? Doesn’t make sense, right?

    And exactly because it doesn’t make any sense is that I think that there is something else that I should find out. And that’s why I rather choose their advice and keep following my heart, instead of listen what everybody else thinks or call reality. Trust me, life is made much more of things we can not touch or see.


    • I have been on holiday, away from all technology hiking in the wilderness with my yogi. So I was to miss your reply and am getting back to now. I do not know why you are to think you are “judged”, and I had pre-read many of your post. Yet still you do not mention this “dear dear friend”. I was to be curious, your early blog said your boyfriend broke up with you on your birthday, yes? Was this Josh, no? Who was this “boyfriend”. That is what is to be mysterious about your secretness and as to why you must hide these people. I was to question you. You are the one to be public blog, I was not judge. As there is but only one who can judge, as you know. You should not to be so jumpy. It is but a question, simple and pure. You are to say these People “dear dear friend” yet not to mention name, I can tell it is the man of another woman by this. What ever, you are free to be you always. Just don’t act so pure.


      • My ex-bf who broke up with me on my birthday is not Josh. That happened a couple months before I know about Josh’s existence and it was over 4 years ago, which made from finding Josh out such a blessing and like finding the most precious treasure in earth to me. And what’s the matter of not mentioning names on my blog posts? Don’t I have the right of protecting all of my friends, whomever are they, women or men? And WHO ARE YOU, to come to my blog and tell such these things to me? Huh? What leads you to believe that just because I do not mention names on my blog posts, which happens in all of my posts, it doesn’t matter whom I’m talking about, I’m talking about someone else’s man? Huh? Are you afraid that your husband is cheating you with me? I’m so sorry to disappoint you, but I am not this kind of woman.


    • i am of curious nature. but that is not what your blog was reading for me. you have the “right” to be of many secrets. and no, in answer to the question, i do not to think you have affair with my “husband” as u say. because my dearest love in life has been to be with his lord for eleven years now. but wish the best for you little one, anyway. and to hope you are doing better soon.


      • I have nothing against people being curious about my texts, but I would like to have my integrity and dignity respected, if you PLEASE.


  2. Josh Groban? You are not to be serious, truly? I thought my eyes were to deceive me. You are a woman of 30? With a celebrity crush that is of a 12 year old school girl? Who is this “friend” that tells you this is to be a rational pursuit of the heart and mind? You need better advice giver, and possible a serious help of a life counselor. My concern is of for only you, my dear young one. Must to be to put your feet upon the earth, and not upon a castle in the sky, yes? Get a better advise giver as well. Who would tell you such silly things?


  3. I wonder why you are so secretive about your love, and your friend. You say not a name ever. Is it because he has another? and so you must keep him secret? that is not love, that is deception, on both your parts. what would your lord say for you to do? are you both hurting a third party by relationships and friendships? i wonder…..


    • NO, he does not have someone else. Plus, I’m not secretive at all about my love. His name is all around my blog, just read every post mine.


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